tough day

Today was a long day as I had to get into work ultra early because I had calls with some folks in Europe.  You would think that with a 7 hour time difference, people could take a call at 10am our time and 5pm their time.  A little inconvienent maybe, but come on.  I was in the office by 630am this morning.  Then, to make matters worse, I had a meeting that lasted late.  What a day.

The worse of it was coming home to take my daughter to the allergist.  We have been having problems with some foods, so we knew it was time to check it out.  Here is the picture of her back...

It broke my heart.  she screamed through the whole process.  The worst case came true.  My daughter is allergic to peanuts and milk.  I am sure we will adjust, but this makes it hard as we now have to make sure she does not come into contact with either of these two items.  If you click on the picture, you can see 2 large swollen spots.  These are where she was exposed to those two allergens.  

Last thoughts

Well, you have seen much of what I saw while I was in China.  I have one additional video that I will upload later this week on my visit to McDonalds, but that will take some time that I don't have tonight.  Here is a simple video.  It comes with a challenge.  Who can identify the one american company that is operating in this city?  You will have to look closely at all of the advertising signage to pick it out, but I am sure someone will...

So I was exhausted, my body clock was 13 hours off, and I hadn't seen my family in a week at this point.  I just wanted to be home.  I was done with the indoor smoking, chicken heads, and the odd recycling customs of China.  I just wanted to get on the plane close my eyes, wake up 15 hours later, and be in Chicago.  

That is where it got interesting.  I am always told to be at the airport 2 hours early.  I usually arrive 50 minutes before the flight.  I am the really friendly guy who is always apologizing as the gate agent is walking me to the front of the security line as my flight is waiting.  And, of course, I am also that guy that gets on the plane last, takes that middle seat that others thought was going to be empty and providing them extra room on the flight.  i then proceed to open every overhead bin in hopes of putting my full size suitcase above my seat only to realize that even with no suitcases up there, mine would not fit.  I then proceed to email off my blackberry until the stewardess yells at me for the 3rd time, and then I figure out that she is serious.

Anyway, I tried to pull the same think at Hong Kong International Airport.  No one told me that just like their cities, their airports are roughly 10x the size of american airports.  I had my usual escort through security and customs thanks to a United First Class ticket.  I was then pointed in the direction of my flight.  They just smiled.  I thought it was because she thought I was cute or maybe she was just nervous that she didn't speak english.  Either way, I was flattered.  I rounded the corner and realized why she had the smirk the size of the airport on her face.  This is the hallway that I saw as I turned the corner:

Yes, that was a legitimate hallway.  I had to make my flight, but I wasn't sure that the hallway ended.  I could not actually see the end of this hallway.  I went back and tried to ask the lady how to actually get to my flight, because there was no way that this was real.  She laughed and claimed not to understand a word I was speaking.  I am not sure if this was the picture or not.  I have a couple of pictures of these long airport hallways from my travels.  For some reason, people overseas don't understand that we Americans don't like to walk miles to our planes.  No joke, there is hallway at least this long in Europe also.  

Anyway, I got to my gate and the plane was delayed.  I had some time to waste, so I went to the airport lounge.  I informed the lady at the front desk that I needed anything that they had to eat that was american and could be eaten without the use of chop sticks.  Here is what she brought me at 9am in the morning:

I gorged myself on some rocky road ice cream and lemon lime flavored seltzer.  Not exactly American, but close enough.  

food and corrections...

First and foremost, I want to thank my wife for opening up what used to be a semi-private blog that I was able to vent my feelings on without too much exposure.  Ever since she posted it on her facebook page, I have realized that many eyes have gazed upon my most private a thought.  I hope I don't bore you, but then again, I don't write this for you.  It is a simple way to clear my head of the oddities and discrepancies I find in daily life, and some meandering childhood memories that I sprinkle in the middle.  Please enjoy the blog, and if you don't, go waste your time somewhere else.

Okay, I have gotten numerous emails today regarding the Lobster on the recycle sign.  I am sorry, but for all of you that thought it was a red jacket, you are wrong.  You have probably heard many wrong things about China, but let me clear a few things up.  Yes, they are generally shorter than us.  Yes, they do smoke much more than us.  But, come on, they don't have four arms.  Why would they have jackets that have fours arms???  Then again, maybe you are all right, I would recycle my jacket if every time I went to put it on I had the choice of 4 arms.  Anyway, its a lobster!

So the next clarification is on the food.  Some people have thought that everything was like the chicken heads.  Well, here are a couple of pictures of some other meals I ate while I was over there.  This was a classic sushi meal.  It is Japanese, but for as much as the Chinese and Japanese don't seem to like each other, they do seem to enjoy each other's food!

The next meal is a picture that I was hoping someone could at least help me identify.  It somewhat resembles the recycling can image, so that scares me a little.  It was actually pretty good so I am not going to knock it too much.  

But, that is enough about the food. How about the drink you ask??  Well, I have a good story on this one.  I was in Hong Kong for meetings and they happened to be at Walt Disney World Hong Kong.  Strange place I know, but it was interesting nonetheless.  For all of you who will ask, Mickey looks the same, the park is smaller, and yes, the Chinese love the park.  Hopefully, that answers all of the dumb questions.  

So for those of you who do not know my wife, I will let you in on a little secret, she loves the Mouse.  It was a little scary in the beginning, but I have come to accept it.  I only have to wear the mouse ears once and a while and, well, nevermind...

Back to the story, I was at Disney Hong Kong and I knew I could not come home without some cheap, imported (well, probably not imported) souvenir.  So, I went down to visit Pocahontas as the gift store and she offers me a beer.  No joke.  Strangest thing I have ever seen.  A chinese woman, dressed as Pocahontas, in Disneyland, in Hong Kong, offers me a beer at check out.

So that is not the best part, here is a picture of the San Miguel Cerveza she offered me:

Only in China.  This is an authentic pull tab beer.  You know the one.  Of course, many won't remember this because it was outlawed in the US over 20 years ago.  Yes, for safety reasons we decided more than 2 decades ago to not take a chance of losing human life due to an inferior product design.  I remember these cans very well.  Please take a trip down memory lane with me...

My father drank Budweiser.  In fact, I am not sure he drank anything else short of coffee.  He was as loyal to a product as you could ever be.  I remember sitting on his lap while he mowed the backyard and he drank Budweiser the whole time.  Now, as an adult, I am not sure I would get on anyone's lap, while they are drink beer, sitting on top of a razor sharp blade spinning at 1,000 rpms!  Anyway, he would drink Bud, with the pull tabs.  He would discard the pull tabs right into the backyard.  Now, back then, no one worried that they could be shot out of the lawn mower at 500mph and the shrapnel could de-head someone.  Or, slightly less gory, a kid could trip and maim themselves on the sheared aluminum can.  Anyway, I just remember those pull tabs from those hot summer days.  The good thing is all the young children in China will still be able to create those memories with their parents.

The best sign in the world!!!

So, in my travels, I have noticed many a sign that seem odd.  Like the following one that is the sign for exit in Europe:

I noticed this sign in a couple of countries so i am assuming it is pretty consistent throughout Europe.  To me, this is much more of a sign that should be illuminated when a fire is raging or you need to evacuate.  This is not a sign for the simple question, "where is the exit".  This implies soo much more than that.  I mean for one, you don't always have to run to the exit.  Aren't we always reminded that we must remain calm and orderly and simply proceed quickly for the exit.  I, for one, think that the Europeans might be right in this situation.  I mean, if the building's buring, or there is someone with a gun, or I need to skip out on my tab, I want to run, not walk, for the exit.  

The final thing about this sign is the white door/exit.  Maybe I am reading way too much into this, but the white light is what dead people see.  It seems odd to me that you would want to run to the light.  Imagine if that was the last thing you saw, the exit sign, glowing in its brillance, showing you the way to the white light...

Okay, sorry, this post wasn't about that sign, but I couldn't pass up the chance to show that sign.  This post is about this sign I saw in China.  The following sign is on a set of 2 garbage cans at the terminal for my flight.  This is another one that you will want to click on and enlarge to get the best view.

Since things are generally backwards, the "other waste" is the first option on the left.  In America, this would be the "garbage" side.  The recycling side we will get to in a minute.  So what exactly does "other waste" mean?  Of course it includes your cigarette butts and bananas.  Not just your peel, but the whole banana.  But then it starts to digress.  It also includes your coffee mugs, yes the ceramic ones.  And, not only your white ceramic one, but also your blue one with its cover.  And, of course, don't forget about your rose from your boyfriend.  But, they take into account your cheap boyfriend.  You know the one, that very special one that dug it out of your front yard while waiting for you to come to the door.  Yes, that special one.  As you can see, when you get to the airport and want to dispose of that Rose with all of the roots and dirt still attached, you have your very own special garbage can in which to dispose of it.  Finally, as you board the plane, you have a place to get rid of your water bottle and full de-boned fish.  And, if the fish skeleton isn't your skeleton, again, you have your very own special garbage can that you can dispose of general bone types also.

Now, of course, you cannot help but notice the unique type of recycling they do in China.  When you glance at the accompanying can, you know right away what to take out of your carryon and recycle.  Right away, you should realize that if they are crustoceans with an exoskeleton, they don't go in the "other waste" side, no, they go in the recyclable side.  This would obviously include lobster shells.  As my lovely wife always says, "if you are not part of the solution, you are part of the problem."  And for all of you out there who have neglected to recycle your lobster shells when traveling, please take note.

Next, you should empty your carryon of the stack of recyclable letters that you have neatly bundled with twine.  I know that many of you don't have recycling at your house, therefore you collect paper and keep it with you while traveling in case you run into a recycling can, and you are in luck today.  As well as your normal bottles and cans, please dispose of your old umbrellas prior to boarding your plane.  My first question was how someone might get all the way to the gate with an old umbrella meant for recycling, but I had trouble with my mandarin and couldn't remember the word in order to ask about this.  

Finally, I know you had been holding out hope.  But, that shoe you have kept for years in hopes of finding the lost matching shoe, yep, time to get rid of that before you get on the plane.  You know the one, that white patent leather shoe that was so perfect at prom in the late 70's, yeah, by now I think the matching shoe is long gone and you should just rid yourself of that memory. 

Well, now you can board your plane with almost nothing left in your carryon and a clear conscious that you did everything you could do today to save the earth...

Chicken Heads!!!

Okay, here is a great picture of what they put before me for dinner while I was in China.  First of all let me say, I am a master with chop sticks after a week.  I may be a few pounds heavier due to a couple of days of the chop stick learning curve, but take my word for it, when you eat like I do and miss out on a few meals due to eating utensils...  you learn quickly.  I can now eat rice, salad and vegetables with chops sticks.  Well, back to this dinner.  As you can see, they liked to present the entire meal.  Yes, feet and all.  I was okay with most of this chicken.  Except for that large thing in the middle of the plate.  Well, here is a close up for those of you who are wondering what it is...

Yes, that is in fact the chicken's head.  I thought it was sad enough that they left the legs/feet intact as they brought this poor bird out for consumption.  But to prop its head up and place it on the plate was a bit much.  Another interesting fact.  Most of the tables have large lazy susans in the middle to spin the food around the table.  Funny when you have 10 people all reaching for different foods and spinning the tables at different times.  Anyway, I had to spin this table away constantly as everyone thought it was funny to spin the table so that this chicken was staring at me the whole meal.  As if I didn't feel bad enough, now I have a dead chicken head making me feel guilty.  

Now the worst part.  They tell me that we should draw straws as to who gets the head.  The woman next to me goes on about how it was her grandmother's favorite part.  I tell her that in her memory, I would be happy to give up my chance at this wonderful prize and forfeit my place in this most prestigous betting pool.  Unfortunately, as the guest of honor, I end up getting nominated before chance can take hold, and I am given the head.  I was already starting to cry a little and wondering how you are supposed to chew the skull and beak.  They explain to me quickly what the brains will taste like and how to avoid those, oh so sharp pieces of bone and cartiledge.  Well, for you doubters, here is the last image I saw prior to blacking out...

Yes, I have eaten some crazy stuff.  Yes, this was the worst.  Yes, I am still sick thinking back to it.  No, I will never do it again.  And, finally, Yes, it tasted like chicken.

Drying clothes and other lessons from China

I know that this is a small photo, so it is not going to do it justice or even really show you what I was trying to express.  In this overly tiny picture, is a large skyscraper from Shanghai.  Actually, just click on the picture and it will go full screen.  Keep in mind, there are a couple of thousand of these throughout Shanghai.  I was amazed at the size of the city.  There are roughly 22 million people in this city.  Or at least that is what my cab driver told me in broken english.  I have not looked that up, so forgive me if that number is wrong.  Anyway, back to my point, they don't have clothes dryers in their apartments.  No one does.  So they resort to hanging their clothes, no matter the floor they live on, out their windows.  As you can see, on the 40th floor, they hang out their windows and put their clothes on these very strange 3-pronged devices.  Imagine the amount of clothing that "disappears" from these devices.  I was also thinking, if I like my neighbors shirt, with a long golf club or broom, I could change my whole wardrobe.  

There are a couple of things that are particularly humorous also.  One, is that their air-conditioners exhaust right into the clothes.  Secondly, the air is so think with smog, that it is palpable in the air.  Thirdly, there is no human way to wash/clean any of these hanging devices post the acid rain.  Anyway, I slip back to childhood as I remember the clean summer smell that embossed my clothing when we hung it out on the line.  Then, I wonder what stokes memories for these kids of the smell of "clean" clothes?  Anyway, I think that it might be best to just dry these clothes with a hair dryer or something.  I guess it is not my choice.

OSHA Standards

Okay, so last week I was in Shanghai for business. It was the first time I had ever been to China.  There were some interesting things that I discovered while I was there, first and foremost, few spoke my native tongue.  While most of you will be surprised, no one seemed interested in communicating to me in my language.  Luckily, I speak Mandarin and therefore was pretty good through my trip.  Actually, I am not even sure if that is how you spell Mandarin or Cantonese while I am at it...

Interesting fact while I am on language, Cantonese and Madarin are spoken languages that are 100% different.  If you only spoke one, you would have absolutely no idea how to understand the other.  The interesting thing is the fact that they are both based on the same written language.  Yes, 2 people in a room could read a written document, and neither would understand the other.  Amazing, but then again, I am amused by the little stuff.

Second crazy fact.  Out of respect, they hand everything to you with two hands.  From business cards to my hotel bill, everything is two hands.  Very different than here in the US.  I am lucky to get a business card handed to me.  Usually, they are dealt like playing cards at the beginning of a very boring meeting.  Anyway, I digress.  

The first post that I wanted to recap China with was all about OSHA safety.  I am going to stop capitalizing osha as it is a real pain to type.  So check out this photo.  This is a large residential building along the highway on the way into Shanghai.  Construction looks very sturdy, right???

Well, if you look closer, the scaffolding is what scared me.  It is actually bamboo poles held together with twine.  Yes, twine...  While this is only a 7 story building, I actually saw this same quality structure up to 23 stories tall in downtown.  I am not sure if there is a shortage of metal or wood, but bamboo and twine would not make me feel safe on the way up to my 10th story job.  Thank goodness the furthest I could fall at work is off my chair and all I would hurt is my ego.  

I will try to blog about my whole trip, there are some great things to come:  Chicken heads for dinner (and yes I have photos), the strangest garbage/recycling signs I have ever seen (pictures here also), and pull tab beer from disney land Hong Kong.  Crazy trip, tons of fun, missed family tons, and here was the picture that I got while I was over in China:

I think maddie tried to pull her hair out while I was gone.  Not sure if it was how much she missed me or that she was with Kacey for 7 days straight.  To avoid speculation, I keep my hair short so i can't pull it out...

Tired...

I hadn't blogged in a while and I was just thinking about getting back into it this week. Then, I get this really sweet email from my little sister complaining about the fact that I never update this page. Due to my yearning to express myself and not giving her any satisfaction as the impetus for resuming this blog, I decided to blog this morning. I am going to blog this weekend about the trip to China that I just returned from. I hate dangling participles, but I couldn't figure out how to rephrase that one. Anyway, I have some great videos and pictures from my trip over there. But, for the moment, Kristy, you will have to be satisfied with my subtle acknowlegement of your email and this small update from my life. While, not all that interesting, it is a start.

Oh, and for everyone that is sleeping as I write this. I got up at 7am, on my day off, to go work out. DEDICATED!!!